NOT NEWSWORTHY NEWS: Student spends 20 minutes trying to throw trash away

NOT NEWSWORTHY NEWS: Student spends 20 minutes trying to throw trash away

Syracuse, New York– Syracuse University student, James Walter, spent over 20 minutes trying to toss a wad of paper in the trash during class on Monday, Nov. 16. Witnesses say Walter was frustrated that he got an F on his British Literature essay titled, “Twilight: Breaking Dawn, Pt. 2;” so he crumpled it up and attempted to toss it in the trash 10 feet away from him.

Classmates watched in agony and confusion as Walter repeatedly missed the trash can. One of Walter’s classmates, Ella Daniels, counted how many times he missed. The final count was around 69. “What was extra annoying was that he would loudly whisper ‘KOBEEEE’ every time he tossed the paper,” said Daniels.

“I was intrigued by his persistence, so I let him keep trying,” said Walter’s professor. “However, his poor balling skills distracted my class and took up a good portion of my lecture.”

Walter played basketball on his high school team as the shooting forward. “I used to be really good at basketball, I was even recruited to play at SU but I turned it down so I could focus on my studies,” said Walter, standing at five foot eight.

According to our sources, Walter was never even considered to play for SU.