The 58th annual Grammy Awards were held on Monday. Here are the thoughts I had throughout the event:

 

1. “Out Of The Woods” is actually kind of catchy, but like #TeamHarryStyles4Ever
2. They must have let her go first because she is not good live
3. People dancing at award shows are always awkward, why do they even bother showing them?
4. LL Cool J will unite us all with a lip sync battle, this I am sure of
5. Flashback to “Rolling In The Deep” just shows that Adele has always killed it
6. Stephen Colbert said “LL” as if it was a nickname
7. Colbert cannot even get a ticket to Hamilton!! HOW RELATABLE
8. Ice Cube had a son just so he could make Straight Outta Compton and so his son could play him
9. I need Kendrick Lamar to win best rap album [and every other Grammy he is up for]
10. YAS KENDRICK LAMAR. YAS TO PIMP A BUTTERFLY
11. If I ever won something and the music played, I would literally never stop talking
12. These men look like they are in a trance by the prompter while announcing Sam Hunt and Carrie Underwood. Omg what is going on with them?
13. Carrie Underwood and Sam Hunt just mesh so well together and on the carpet, she said she voted for him to win Best New Artist. S’cute
14. Sam Hunt looks like he could be in a 2008 emo band with his haircut
15. Oh, Ariana Grande thinks that she made the Weeknd because of that ONE song [“Love Me Harder”]
16. Also, her “Earned It” pun was just a plug so she could sing on stage
17. “Can’t Feel My Face” is totally about coke, but we all still jam hardcore to it like cokeheads
18. The slower version of “In The Night” is the Weeknd’s way to prove he is MUCH more than a rapper
19. Andra Day is so amazingly talented with such a beautiful range, I wish I had actual words
20. Ellie Goulding does not have the voice to sing with her
21. SPAGHETTI HAIR
22. Chris Stapleton won Best Country Album and he thanked “Taylor Swift glitter bombing” omg
23. I love James Corden
24. Meghan Trainor, Demi Lovato, Luke Bryan, Tyrese Gibson, and John Legend are the weirdest combo
25. John Legend is so cute and Lionel Richie loves his tribute thus far
26. Lionel is so sweaty right now, omg someone is getting worked up
27. Everyone is looking at Meghan with their fake smiles
28. TYRESE AND BRICK HOUSE ARE EVERYTHING
29. I just thought Robin Thicke jumped on stage, but it is actually Lionel
30. Lionel is just doing his own echo right now, how cute
31. Little Big Town sounds creepy and stalkerish, especially with the lightening right now
32. I missed why Stevie Wonder was on stage and everyone told me he just wandered up on stage -__-
33. The one kid from the Pentatonix looks like Meep from AHS
34. Stevie Wonder probably cannot read the card for who wins, do you think it is in braille?
35. Stevie Wonder made a blind joke! THE CARD IS IN BRAILLE
36. “Thinking Out Loud” wins Song of the Year
37. Is that woman with Ed Sheeran wearing a garbage bag?
38. Ed Sheeran is so amazing
39. Taylor Swift is a fake b*tch, crying “for Ed Sheeran,” but actually because she did not win
40. People love The Eagles still?
41. James Bay is honestly my favorite human being ever and I hope he wins the Best New Album of the Year
42. Tori Kelly can hit the high notes and hold them for so long
43. Tori and James performing together was beautiful, I almost shed a tear
44. If Hamilton was not big enough and hard enough to get tickets for already, it will be almost impossible now
45. Obama has seen Hamilton THREE times and I waited in a line four blocks long to win tickets in the lottery to see it. I did not win [the nerve of some presidents, amirite?]
46. Kendrick has 11 nominations tonight, crazy
47. Glow Paint, a HUGE bonfire, and traditional African dancers — Kendrick is KILLING this performance
48. Did anyone think that Hamilton was not gonna win Best Musical?
49. Best Rock Performances are dominating by the females
50. Alabama Shakes wins over Foo Fighters, weird wins!
51. Is Bruno Mars shirtless under his vest right now as he announces Adele?
52. Adele bringing out my tears right now
53. Someone just told me Diplo and Skrillex are Jack U….my mind is blown
54. Skrillex on guitar is making me uncomfortable
55. Justin is losing layers
56. “Where Are U Now” live is quite the experience, especially with all the drums being hit
57. I need James Bay to win Best New Artist
58. HOW DID MEGHAN TRAINOR WIN BEST NEW ARTIST, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
59. Lady Gaga and the David Bowie tribute is beautifully digital
60. Alabama Shakes is so underrated and the lead singer in her white cape gown is an ANGEL
61. Dave Grohl
62. Alice Cooper, Johnny Depp, and Joe Perry performing as the Hollywood Vampires are everything my little goth soul needs
63. Side note: does anyone remember when Alice Cooper was in Dark Shadows? Well this performance reminds me of that
64. Album of the Year goes to Taylor Swift, so her ego just got 10 billion times more obnoxious
65. “Uptown Funk” won Record of the Year!! A jam for the ages
66. Pitbul reminds me of a naked mole rat